Song of the Week (Jan 30th to Feb 5th)

Whoa this week's winner is a hell of a smoking hot pick. It's none other than "Burning" by Mia Martina. I don't know if you've hear it before but I think it rocks! It's playing over and over in my head since the last few weeks. The songstress looks so exotic that I thought she might be Arabic or Latina but she's in fact a French-Canadian from the province of New Brunswick lol!!! Can you believe it?! I can't. Especially since it means she speaks French but she must have an incredibly thick accent as them people in the maritimes, they speak like a lobster is stuck in their throat and causing them to choke to death.

Anyways, I don't know about you but even though it's freezing cold here in Quebec, "I'm burning burning burning burning just like a fire, burning burning burning burning for you tonight" ;-)! Enjoy lil' dinosaurs!



Relationshit

Don't get all offended by the title, you read correctly. Writing this article will be liberating for me I think, for all my relationships turn out to be relationshit. It gets to shit pretty quickly for me... no pun intended.

Okay so my latest date -we'll call it a date, it wasn't a relationship or shit yet- was going pretty good so far but things got twisted pretty quickly once again. Before I go into a lot of details and whine about how bad it ended, I'll explain to you how it started so that you get the picture.

First we met in a very unlooked-for fashion for it was the night we went out in the gay village while Nizza was visiting here. The club we went to is called Unity and is actually one of the biggest and most popular gay clubs in the city (google it). That night K had agreed to drive for Rodzilla so he could get his ass as drunk as God would allow. We went there accompanie by Gabuschka who had brought her ex-bf along with her.

It doesn't get cheaper than us when it's time to get wasted; we're like broke Soviets trying to pull off a basement party after all the ration coupons have been used. In fact, we had filled two 2L of juice with tons of Vodka and Gin and drank it in the car while parked (lol). We had also drunk some wine prior to that so needless to say that Rodzilla was already gone thirty minutes before he even entered in tha club.

It didn't take long for us to sashay across the dancefloor and disturb all the other cheapasses and scantily clad queers out there. Yours truly, Rodzilla, cannot feel shame nor lack of social interaction around him when he's drunk which usually results in a lot of confusion for the people surrounding me as I turn into a crazy rapist and bump'n grind everyone who dares cross path with me!

That being said, I was horny and tired which is a very odd combination when one goes out; let's face it, when one is in that mood, he'll want to knock socks with the cutest thing in tha place. Which is just what I was aiming for. I first began harrassing a poor little lesbian in a corner but she seemed to like it! Then I proceeded to circle around the whole dancefloor (with K, Nizza and Gabuschka all trying to figure out what the fuck I was doing) and found myself trapped into a velcro duo with a young and skinny twink who wouldn't let go of me. I do think that dude was into me and thought he'd targeted the right market but truth is Rodzilla was aiming for a tad more flesh to play with. Of course, I'd be lying if I were to tell you I dislike them skinny guys but you know what, I was just not that into him and he wouldn't understand it.

The situation was getting worse as I was too drunk to talk and therefore, couldn't tell him to piss off. His strong grip would make me miss opportunities to frolick with all the other hotter dudes around. That was getting too much and too out of control for The Big Dog. That's when I took things in hands and decided to escape him. He must have thought we were still in the '90s and that he could somehow manage to look like Enrique Iglesias because he seemed to be thinking "I could run, I could hide but I couldn't escape his love". Well, what about hell no I'm not obliged to stickwithu like The Pussies would have sung it if I don't want to?!

I tried my best to ensure that he wouldn't notice the new spot I had found for our quartet of drunkasses but the bastard saw us. I resolved to dance with a trio of black sistas but he still followed me. I mighta been drunk, this dude was getting on my nerves big time and even though I'm all up against rejection, I'm all about tough love and lessons as well and I was getting close to the point where I would just tell him to stay the fuck away, that my cock was on vacation.

The clever idea of taking it a step further up the small central stage bobbed in my head and I decided to hop on it and leave the harrassing twink down. This is when my last date comes into the story: he was dancing on the stage in a very provocative way, waiting for Rodzilla to make him rrrr. Worst thing evah happened up there: twinkie twinkie followed me and would still try to have me dry-hump him even though I had already started making out with Lada (we'll call him like that for quality and reliability purposes). I guess that after 10 minutes, he got it and left.

This is the moment you've been longing for; the moment where Rodzilla burst into a big liar and compulsive verbal intruder. When Lada asked me where I was from, I instantly chose to lie to him to make me appear more interesting and exotic. I told him I was from Norway and that Nizza was my sister! I thought I'd fool around lying to him just for a few minutes for I never thought we'd stick together all night lol! He seemed to be appalled that I was from Norway and I think he liked the idea of me being of Viking decent. I bullshat so much that night, it was unbelievable! I couln't stop myself anymore! I think I was growing more and more full of shit and tried to see if he'd continue to believe me lol!

I told him I was from Rogaland, Norway and spoke a very local Norwegian dialect lol! I tried to say Norwegian sentences but as my knowledge for that lamguage is limited, I mixed random words from German, Dutch, Swedish, Danish and even Icelandic to make sure it would sound kind of Scandinavian loll!!! It was getting so hot between him and I that at one point, we locked ourselves into the john in order to take it to tha next level. We got caught by the security guard who could tell from afar that we were there because both our heads were taller than the bathroom's door!!!

I never thought I'd see Lada again especially since he lives so far and when you have such a name and a Russian car, you normally don't drive to the city too often! Our first date after the clubbing thing was at the Ström spa with Nizza and Terrine (the latter used to work there before getting her iPhone stolen). Everything worked out fine between us and we even went on to have four more dates which were all pretty pleasurable overall. We didn't encounter any major problem until the cunt started giving me text message attitude and respond 24 hours later at each text I'd send him. We were supposed to see each other on a wednesday night but he never texted me again or approved to see me and gave me a lameass excuse the following day saying that he had had a "shitty week with many problems including a car accident".

Freshmen Car Wash: Thank You Andrew Christian!

Damn! I just happened to watch this incredibly sexy and erection-friendly buzz video by Andrew Christian and trust me, the effect it had on me is physiologically measurable :-P!!! Goddamnit, have you ever seen so many cute twinks frolicking around in very flattering baby blue underwear?! Not me! This video is actually better than a wet dream because you won't wake up feeling punked that this was just a dream; it's not, you can watch it over and over again as many times as you want and it will never disappear! Plus you won't get a surprising juicy shortcoming after waking up because you'll already be awake! Okay, time for Rodzilla to shut up and spread the love! Enjoy!

Song of the Week (Jan 16th to Jan 22nd)

I'm excited to tell you that my pick for this week is no one else but Coldplay (!). I know nobody would expect me to be a fan of them, which is actually a fact but I can still appreciate their music and style. The song of the week is Paradise by Coldplay. I love, love, love the pace of the song and its rhythm and kinda find it appropriate for the winter season as we're all vedge and hybernating and are daydreaming of a warm and sunny "paradise" lol! I also love their elephant costumes as they remind me of the small puppets we had at elementary school lol! Enjoy!



Latest Issue of Kurv Magazine

Ah them Aussies! They have so many good magazines for Gays that are filled with steamy and homo-erotic pics! Me gusta! In this edition of Kurv Magazine, my favourite model Chad White was cast alongside other sizzling hot models like Fabio Mancini, Kaylan Morgan and Jean Carlos Santos to be photographed by reknown Italian photographer Giovanni Squatriti. Styling was done by Duffy Bergman who incorporated them vivid colors and playful theme to the editorial. Bravissimo!

Winter Haven (A Recollection of Events)

I had the pleasure to spend the holidays with my dear Norwegian friend Nizza.

Geez there's nothing that I love more than traveling, unraveling new stuff and chilling out with friends! In effect, I had the privilege to spend the winter holidays with my dear friend Nizza who was sweet enough to fly all the way to New York to meet with me before Christmas. 

Olympic Stadium from the Parc Maisonneuve

As I wrote in my article about our New York escapade, Nizza, K, Michael and I spent a few days in the Big Apple shopping, eating out, drinking and visiting. The same day we left New York City, we drove all the way to Quebec and had the misfortune to get caught speeding on the highway by a sheriff from the New York State. Goddamnit, I was ten minutes from the Canadian border and had to get caught!

I guess Nizza will always remember the first time she saw my house as I almost drove us all the way into it; the streets being super icy and slippery, I couldn't brake and therefore slid towards the house and was stopped only by the garbage bin and the tree in front of my house!!!

SNOW AND ICE!!!

 I know Nizza way too well and was 100% sure she'd love going out on the South shore as its population consists mainly of douchebags and slutty, easy girls who are the Quebeccer-equivalent of Jersey Shore's guidos and guidettes. That first night in the "belle Province", I introduced my Norwegian counterpart to the "bring your own wine" restaurant fashion and stunned her by the latter. She said such a thing could never happen in Norway! We then all headed to the "Commission des Liqueurs" located in the wannabe-cool DIX30 district to celebrate Merry's departure for Nice, where she'll be an exchange student until May-June. 

That night out was incredibly awkward as we were all exhausted, were living our first day or extremely nasty weather and didn't feel like mingling with all them other guests. The barman of the commission was the typical douchebag I wanted Nizza to catch a glimpse of which resulted into a grin as the bastard was unclassy enough to strip down to his underwear on the bar's counter in front of the whole crowd which consisted of 99% straight men and women (the residual 1% being myself, Rodzilla).

I was getting drunk and seized the opportunity to grab that rock-hard ass of his and dared Nizza to do the same. She didn't dare to, unfortunately! That same night, Nizza ate her first poutine which I think didn't bedazzle her as she said it ""taste like something her brother and her could freestyle on at home" lol! I guess it's not impressive anyway so we shouldn't be disappointed by her reaction lol!

Terrine feeding a deer from the inside of her car!

We went out again on the friday night before Christmas but that will lead to another article (wait a bit!). Nizza was horrified to wake up the next day as she had been invited by Terrine to a family party in the not-so-fabulous town of Trois-Rivières. Thereat, she met Terrine's cousin Tristan who unlike the clothing brand of the same name, is not super classy nor businessman-clad. Indeed, that cousin of hers is missing one leg and has his whole body covered with biker-like tattoos and piercings. Nizza said she liked him so I told her she should call for a booty session but it seems like she felt uncomfortable to get stuffed by a one-legged ex-military. I made a mental picture of that and imagined the scene similar to Rose McGowan's character in "Planet Terror" when she's making love with her bf in the movie! 

Song of the Week (Jan 9th to Jan 15nd)

Hi y'all!! Sorry if I haven't posted since last week! Ah school and dating! Anyways, I'm pretty thrilled to have narrowed down my picks for this week's winner song. I will share with you my joy and anticipation with Amy Winehouse's latest discovery from her posthumous "Lioness: Hidden Treasures" compilation album: "Our Day Will Come". I believe this song's rhythm and vibe sounds festive and positive and could almost be appropriate for the Christmas holidays that just passed! I like to think of that song as a self-projection in the future and how we foresee it. This latest album from Amy Winehouse's discography is always playing in my car while I'm driving carefully to make sure I survive this winter where we're getting hit with snowstorms and ass-cold weather (-30)! Enjoy y'all!!!

Down Under with Bel Ami

Well it seems like the "Bel Ami" crew had had a blast visiting the Aussies Down Under for a DNA Magazine photoshoot. I bet the staff from DNA had a blast too and that their zippers got blasted with huge bulks as well upon seeing all that hotness!!! You'll definitely enjoy admiring Kris Evans and Dolph Lambert in little DNA undies. The only golden boy that's missing is Erik Bouna, my ultimate twink favourite :(! Anyways, Enjoy!

Biting Into the Big Apple

As I mentionned earlier, I visited "The Big Apple" aka New York City two weeks ago accompanied by the fabulous K and Nizza and also by Michael, an Asian friend of mine who I study at University with.

The whole trip was completely unexpected and planned at the last minute; not even 48 hours in advance! Indeed, Nizza called me two days before (sunday, december 18th) her arrival date to announce to me that she had finally found a reasonably-priced roundtrip flight ticket from Stavanger-Sola to New York City. For those of you who have never flown before or are not used to book flight tickets online, the key to saving a few pesos is to compare prices among different airlines and on different retail websites. 

Abercrombie and Fit model and us ;-)

I had warned Nizza that the flights from SVG to YUL were pretty pricy at that point and that we should've booked them in advance in order to have okay fees. Therefore, I told her to look out for flights heading to Boston, Toronto or New York City. In turned out that the cheapest was NY as there are several translantic flights per day connecting The Big Apple to the old continent.

And that's how Michael, K, K's mom and I drove all afternoon that sunday heading south toward the Empire State of Mind. We reached the overly-populated island of Manhattan shortly after dinner. Travelling with Chinese folks also implies a lot of shopping for brands and sales!!! All three of them forced Rodzilla to stop at the Duty Free before crossing the American border. The prices indicated were just slightly cheaper than in Canada or in the States which means that you should shop by category in these shops since certain items might be worth the hassle to stop there while some others might be about the same price.

You know you're in Little Italy  when...

Another very important stop we had to make was Woodbury Common Premium Outlets which is in fact a H.U.G.E. retail outlet outdoor mall located in Red Apple Central Valley, NY two hours shy of the Big Apple. I believe these outlets were very interesting and appealing for savvy shoppers but as for the tired driver that I was, I didn't feel like buying anything and the fact that we needed to walk outside between shops anoyed me very much as the temperature was friggin' cold!!!

The moment we reached Chinatown, we had to hurry the (&*? up to bring all of our luggages into K²'s hotel room in order to leave some space for Nizza. We then sashayed away into the ghettos of Queens and Brooklyn in a New York minute to get at JFK where Nizza was scheduled to land. We waited an hour in awe at Terminal 4 (probably the ugliest terminal at JFK) and that's when the lovely Norwegian made her way out through the arrival hall and greeted us with her cute Scandinavian smile. I presented every single one of them to each other and proposed we leave the airport before the parking fees exceeded what we wanted to spend on food and booze.

That night, we were all so dead tired that we did nothing but eat and get off to bed. The following morning, I went shopping with the Chinese posse at Bloomingdale's while Nizza was recuperating from her lack of sleep and jet lag. We then hopped in a cab toward the Empire State Building and went to the top to take pictures and admire the New York skyline. I thought I'd be scared shitless as the first time I had been there (I was 14 at the time), I could barely breathe nor open my eyes and my family had made fun of my virtigo!

New York skyline

We walked a bit north towards Times Square, visited or should I say, shop again at Toys'r'us and agreed to eat a generous meal at Bubba Gump. I have to tell you that their Cajun shrimps were probably the best dish I had in ages and that their menu is definitely high on price/quality ratio! I also took a Fisherman's plate and a Louisiana Lemonade which allowed me to get a free glass buck at the end! A few minutes before we left the restaurant, we asked our waiter if he knew any good night clubs in NY as we were looking forward to go out and get loose. He said he didn't go out very often so he couldn't really help and came back with his colleague; a tall and lean African-American twink.

Song of the Week (Jan 2nd to Jan 8th)

This article marks the first time I'm blogging in 2012! Curiously enough, it seems like the end of the world hasn't arrived yet! The proof is: Rodzilla is still there to write to you ;-)! I wanna start this year fresh and fun with a song that entails what I have in mind: don't let yoself be fooled by them people who claim that 2012 is the end of the world lol! That's right, it's cool 'cause I got it like that, I'm a player. And this week's winner is "2012 (It Ain't the End of the World)" by no one else but Nicki Minaj and the cute British baklava Jay Sean. Enjoy y'all!!!